You Know You’re in a Sleep Regression When… (A Humorous Guide for Tired Parents)

Sometimes, the only thing you can do during a sleep regression is laugh (and maybe cry a little into your lukewarm tea). If you’re wondering whether you’ve entered a sleep regression, here are a few light-hearted signs that say: yes, yes you have.

1. Your baby is up more times in the night than your kettle is in a day

You’ve boiled the kettle five times but still haven’t had a full cup of tea. You set it down… and forget where you put it. Sleep regression, hello.

2. You Google “why is my baby waking up every 45 minutes” at 2am

Then again at 3am. Then again at 4am. You’re not even expecting new information anymore-you’re just looking for emotional support from the internet.

3. You’ve tried white noise, pink noise, brown noise… maybe even whale sounds

You’d try the sound of rain on a tin roof in the Amazon if someone told you it would help your baby sleep more than 20 minutes.

4. You start negotiating with your baby

“If you sleep for one more hour, I’ll give you my car. Or my soul. Please.”

5. You can recite ‘Twinkle Twinkle Little Star’ in 5 languages

And you hum it under your breath even when your baby isn’t in the room. You’ve become the musical mobile.

6. Your partner looks like your flatmate

You pass like ships in the night. “Your turn?” “My turn?” No time for a kiss—just handoffs and head nods.

7. You consider writing to CBeebies to thank them for saving your sanity

You’ve watched so much Hey Duggee that you start dreaming about the Squirrel Club. It’s okay. We all do it.

But Here’s the Beautiful Part…

You’re not alone. Every tired parent has been where you are. It’s a strange, emotional, exhausting ride-but also filled with funny moments and deep love.

You may feel like you’re barely holding it together-but your baby sees you as their whole world. You’re doing a brilliant job, even if your socks don’t match and your coffee is cold.

This phase will pass. Sleep will return. And one day, you’ll tell a new parent, “I remember that stage… we made it through.”

Until then, give yourself a break. Laugh where you can. Cry when you need to. And know that you’ve got this.

Sleep regression: rough now, but part of the journey. And you’re not walking it alone.